Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Affection...isn't this something that everybody wants and craves???? The answer is NO.
Growing up hugs, kisses, cuddles, and many many praises were normal in my household.
My parents are very affectionate, sometimes to a fault. (my parents aren't weird pedophiles or anything, just very loving people) This is how I grew up and what I am/was used to. This is how I learned to show love. When you love someone you hug them, you kiss them, and you praise them.
But then I met my "better half"! He is not opposed to affection but definitely lacks in the affection department. He is not a hugger, not a kisser, not a cuddler. This is not to say he doesn't do these things, he does, just not on a regular basis. He is much better with the 4 year old then he is with others, but it still isn't the amount I grew up with. He grew up with just his Mom (his Dad passed when he was young), not sure if this has anything to do with his "shying" away from affection, just an observation on my part.
As you can imagine this was quite an adjustment for me. In previous relationships and from what I saw growing up I was used to couples holding hands, kissing, cuddling on the couch while watching T.V. and these things just seemed foreign to him. Slowly he has come around to my way of thinking, and slowly I have become more like him. I think this happens with alot of couples, maybe we are more normal than anyone could have ever imagined!!!
There are times when all of us need our space, but there are also times when everyone needs a hug, kiss, or just a special look that lets them know they are not alone and there are people who love and care for them.